Damn!
Why
didn't
we
think
of
sending
the
amazing
super-hero
Emraan
Hashmi
to
Australia
before?
Emraan
Saab's
solution
to
global
malevolence,
as
provided
in
this
disappointing
mishmash
of
masala
and
headlines,
is
simple
enough.
It's
good
to
be
bad.
So
says
the
smooth-sayer.
Fair
enough.
If
only
the
director
had
not
decided
to
apply
the
motto
to
the
treatment
of
this
film.
At
last,
our
revenge
on
the
Aussie
attacks.
This
film
is
the
ultimate
comeuppance
for
the
Australians...
Those
so-and-sos,
who
have
been
maltreating
our
hapless
students,
who
go
to
the
firangi
land
to
garner
education
and
come
back
black
and
blue.
Blue
is
the
colour
that
director
Mohit
Suri
favours
for
his
lurid
leery
look
at
gori
babes
in
Melbourne.
There's
a
gori
chick
and
a
brown
chick
for
the
Chick-let
hero
to
choose
from.
He
sleeps
with
the
former
and
falls
in
love
with
the
later.
As
simple
as
that.
Indian
women
are
too
revered.
Foreigners
are
to
be…you
know!
In
trying
to
do
a
ferocious
flag-waving
trick
over
the
complex
issue
of
racism
and
colour
prejudice,
Crook
ends
up
making
the
Australian
population
look
like
a
bunch
of
psychotic
killers
bashing
and
burning
the
good
desi
boys,
who
have
gone
under
to
gain
gyan.
Is
this
Australia
or
Chicago
during
the
Prohibition?
But
wait.
Suddenly
the
script
decides
to
tilt
the
imbalance.
Now,
the
goras
are
not
that
evil.
It
seems
Indians
too
create
an
obstinate
culture
block
when
they
go
abroad.
They
just
don't
know
how
to
blend.
Thoroughly
confused
in
its
politics,
Crook
is
one
of
those
films
that
attempts
to
combine
conviction
with
entertainment
and
falls
between
the
two
stools
in
the
absence
of
those
tools
that
lend
skillful
curves
and
slants
to
the
storytelling.
The
narrative
is
uneven
lopsided
and
askew.
The
pace
goes
from
sluggish
to
frantic
within
a
few
reels
providing
us
with
no
space
to
observe
the
characters'
motivations
beyond
a
cursory
glance.
Mohit
Suri,
who
revealed
a
substantial
grip
over
his
material
and
characters
in
Kalyug,
is
seen
here
undecided
about
where
to
take
his
plot.
The
people
who
populate
the
storytelling
seem
to
start
off
on
page
1
of
the
newspaper
and
then
head
towards
the
cartoon
section.
Technical
aspects,
another
strong
aspect
of
Mahesh
Bhatt's
films,
are
on
this
occasion
just
about
okay.
The
performances
miss
the
intensity
of
Bhatts'
Gangster
and
Kalyug
by
a
wide
margin.
But
Neha
Sharma
makes
an
expressive
Hindi-cinema
debut.
As
for
our
super-hero...
Move
over,
Rajinikanth.
Emraan
Khan
is
more
robotic
in
his
expressions
than
you
can
ever
be.
Australia
will
never
be
the
same
again.
Story first published: Tuesday, October 12, 2010, 12:27 [IST]