Yes, you read it right! Saif Ali Khan had himself revealed some bitter truths about his marriage and divorce with ex-wife Amrita Singh.
In a throwback interview to a leading daily, Saif Ali Khan had openly talked about his failed marriage, the amount he paid to Amrita for divorce, why he was not allowed to meet his kids, his then girlfriend Rosa and much more...
My Wife & I have Gone Separate Ways
In an interview to famous film journalist Subhash K Jha, Saif Ali Khan had said, ''My wife and I have gone our separate ways. I respect my wife's space. But why am I being constantly reminded of how terrible a husband I was, and how awful a father I am.''
I Am Not Allowed To Meet My Children
''I've my son Ibrahim's photograph in my wallet. Each time I look at it, I feel like crying. I miss my daughter Sarah all the time. I'm not allowed to meet my children.''
They Are Not Allowed To Visit Me
''They aren't allowed to come to visit me, let alone stay with me. Right now my kids are growing up with Amrita's relatives and maidservants while she's out working in a TV serial. Why does she need to do that, when I'm more than willing to support my family.''
I Am Supposed To Give Amrita 5 Crore
"I'm supposed to give Amrita Rs 5 crore, of which I've already given her approximately Rs 2.5 crore. Also, I'm paying Rs 1 lakh per month until my son becomes 18.''
I Am Not Shahrukh Khan
''I'm not Shahrukh Khan. I don't have that kind of money. I've promised her I'll pay up the rest of the money, and I will, even if I've to slog till I drop dead. Whatever I've earned from doing ads, stage shows and films is being given for my children.''
I Have No Money
''I've no money. Our bungalow is for Amrita and the kids, and never mind the relatives who've joined her after my departure. Rosa and I stay in a pokey two-room apartment.''
It Isn't Nice To Be Constantly Reminded How Worthless You Are
''Still, I've never been more at peace with myself. After a long long time I feel my self-worth has returned. It isn't nice to be constantly reminded of how worthless you are.''
And To Have Abuses Thrown At Your Mother & Sister All The Time
''And to have taunts, jeers, insults and abuses thrown at your mother and sister all the time. I've gone through all of it. Now I feel healed again.''
I Have Found Someone Who Actually Makes Me Feel I Am Worth Something
''Today, if I've found someone who actually makes me feel I'm worth something, what's wrong with it' Earlier, I had hit such a rock bottom with my self-esteem that I'd be shocked if someone complimented me for my looks! Today if someone says something nice, I say, ‘That's fine. Stars are supposed to be complimented'."
Unlike Amrita, Rosa Is Not From The Film Industry
"Unlike Amrita, Rosa is not from the film industry. Sure, I liked being put in touch with the industry's bigwigs by Amrita, having dinner with Karan Johar, etc. But in hindsight I'd have been better off finding my way through the industry.''
There Is A Theory That Whatever I Have Become It's Because Of Amrita
''There's a theory that I became whatever I am because Amrita took me by my finger and led me through it all. She has played a big hand in my growth as an actor and human being.''
Even Shahrukh Khan's Wife Gauri Keeps Out Of His Career
"But it's a blessing to be with a woman who has nothing to do with movies. Even Shahrukh's wife Gauri keeps out of his career. I'd like to keep it that way."
Let Amrita Call My Kids Sara Singh & Ibrahim Singh
"I really want my kids. But I don't want to put up a constant fight over them. If they are to be taken away from me then let Amrita call them Sarah Singh and Ibrahim Singh.''
Let Me Die Of Shame
"Let my daughter become 18 and ask me, ‘Where were you Dad, when my brother and I needed you?' Let me die of shame.''
I Have Had The Courage To Finally Walk Away From An Impossible Relationship
"But please don't kill me with a feeling of constant guilt just because I've had the courage to finally walk away from an impossible relationship to find some solace."
Saif Ali Khan had concluded by saying, "I want no confrontation with Amrita. She was, and will remain, an integral part of my life. I want her and my kids to be happy."
Also Read: Ranveer Singh Is AVOIDING Deepika Padukone; Doesn't Even Want To Get Clicked With Her!