Actor
Irrfan
Khan
succumbed
to
neuroendocrine
tumour
on
April
29,
2020,
leaving
his
family
and
fans
across
the
globe
devastated.
Since
then,
his
wife
Sutapa
Sikdar
and
son
Babil
Khan
have
been
taking
to
their
respective
social
media
handles
to
document
how
they
have
been
coping
with
their
loss.
On
Irrfan's
first
death
anniversary
today
(April
29,
2021),
Sutapa
took
to
her
Facebook
page
to
share
a
heartfelt
post
in
which
she
recalled
her
final
moments
with
her
late
husband
and
how
she
is
taking
time
to
cope
with
his
absence.
Quoting
a
line
by
Irrfan's
favourite
poet
Anaïs
Nin,
Sutapa
began
her
post
by
writing,
"People
living
deeply
have
no
fear
of
death"...
Anaïs
Nin
your
favourite
poet
Irrfan.
Last
year
tonight
me
and
my
friends
sang
songs
for
you,all
your
favorite
songs.
The
nurses
were
looking
at
us
strangely
as
they
were
used
to
religious
chants
in
critical
times
but
I
had
overdone
that
for
you
Irrfan
morning
evening
and
night
for
two
years
and
since
they
told
me
it
was
time
I
wanted
you
to
go
with
memories
you
loved
...so
we
sang
songs....next
day
you
left
for
the
next
station
I
hope
you
knew
where
to
get
down
without
me."
She
further
continued,
"363
days
eight
thousand
seven
hundred
and
twelve
hours..when
each
second
is
counted.
how
exactly
does
one
swim
this
huge
ocean
of
time.
The
clock
had
stopped
At
11.11
on
29th
april
for
me
....Irrfan
you
had
a
keen
interest
in
mystery
of
numbers
.
.and
funny
you
had
three
11's
on
your
final
day
.
some
say
actually
many
say
this
is
a
very
mystical
number
11/11/11."
Recalling
how
his
death
affected
her,
Sutapa
wrote,
"How
does
one
walk
ahead
the
pandemic
just
adds
to
the
anxiety,
fear
and
pain.
The
days
went
by
with
umpteen
responsibilities
some
extremely
new
ones
like
signature
galore
for
changing
of
name.
My
fingers
kept
stopping
on
that
how
could
I
just
take
his
name
away
and
make
it
sutapa,
I
was
unable
to
sign
took
a
day
off
and
the
name
game
played
on
my
mind."
"Like
a
film
in
a
projector
.i
remember
sitting
outside
NSD
late
evening
..beautiful
girls
from
kathak
kendra
floating
out
..they
were
all
very
well
dressed
up
unlike
us
we
were
always
in
our
blue
trackpant
and
sky
blue
t
shirt
..both
boys
and
girls
wore
the
same
...and
you
mispronounced
my
name
and
I
tried
to
correct
and
rubbed
it
in
as
usual
my
permanent
thing
that
north
Indians
are
so
stupid
and
they
only
can
pronounce
sunny
Vicky
Rahul
type
names
and
proceed
to
kake
ki
dukaan
in
gol
chakkar
to
have
ek
bata
do
chai
....its
been
a
long
journey
of
correcting
each
other
spanning
a
life
time.
fighting
arguing
laughing
evolving
together.
you
were
the
loner
in
a
crowd.
And
now
a
whole
crowd
has
followed
you
up
there
..by
the
way
OM
from
the
tea
stall
in
the
nukkad
went
some
years
back
has
he
made
a
chai
ka
stall
up
there?
are
you
having
ek
bata
do
chai
there.
and
are
drinking
water
from
the
running
streams?,"
Sutapa
continued
in
her
post.
"All
of
you
stay
in
peace
remember
us
that
we
loved
you,
all
of
you.
And
remember
all
of
you
is
missed
by
some
one
or
the
other
..all
your
families
grieve
..may
you
all
rest
in
peace!
I
hope
there
is
enough
space
I
hope
some
of
you
will
forgive
us
for
not
been
able
to
give
a
respectable
cremation.#irrfan#NSD#nationbleeding#wearesorry#restinpeace," Sutapa
signed
off
her
post
on
an
emotional
note.
Earlier,
in
an
interview,
Sutapa
had
said
that
her
cosmic
connection
with
the
late
actor
has
continued
even
after
his
death.
She
had
said
that
she
still
feels
his
presence
around
her.