By
Subhash
K.
Jha,
IndiaFM
Tuesday,
August
21,
2007
Two
things
puzzled
me
deeply
at
the
end
of
this
aesthetically-shot
benign
cross-cultural
romance
between
a
B-grade
Hollywood
actress
and
a
Bollywood
choreographer.
Why
does
Salman
insist
on
being
called
Prem
or
Sameer
in
most
of
his
films?
A
homage
to
his
two
filmmaker-buddies
Sooraj
Barjatya
and
Sanjay
Bhansali?
And.....did
Gulshan
Grover
dub
the
one
syllable
("Yes")
that
he
gets
to
utter?
Playing
the
strong
and
silent
haveli
guard,
a
la
Bachchan
in
Vinod
Chopra's
Eklavya
(another
homage??)
Grover
scowls
at
everyone
in
sight
specially
Salman
romancing
his
American
mehmaan
from
across
the
'sloven'
seas.
To
begin
wuth
Marigold(Ali
Larter)
is
unbathed,
misbehaved,
misinformed
and
Miss
Incorrigible
all
the
way.
In
her
journey
from
the
US
to
India
she
lies
to
get
a
seat,
talks
loudly
and
rudely
on
her
phone
after
takeoff
is
announced,
screams
at
the
cabbie
in
Mumbai
and
sneers
at
the
kind
helpful
production
controller(Suchitra
Pillai)
who
's
given
the
thankless
task
of
informing
the
bratty
b-grader
from
Hollywood
that
the
film
she
came
to
shoot
in
India
has
been
shelved.
Then
of
course
,
Marigold
misbehaves
some
more.
Soon
we
get
to
know
why.
"I've
never
done
a
film
which
doesn't
have
a
number
in
front
of
the
title...
Basic
Instinct
3,
Fatal
Attraction
4....After
every
film
of
mine
my
father
leaves
me
a
voice-
mail
message
asking
how
much
lower
I'll
fall," she
tells
the
calm
cool
and
captivating
choreographer.
Soon,
they
are
serenading
each
other
on
the
Goan
beaches
and
then
in
the
stunning
Rajasthani
havelis
where
the
narrative
shifts
in
the
second-half.
The
choreographer-
meets
-B-grader
scenes
have
some
charm
in
the
first
-half,
thanks
to
Salman's
innate
charisma.
For
reasons
best
know
to
him
and
his
American
director,
his
eyes
are
mostly
wet
in
the
movie,
making
this
a
kind
of
'moist-see' experience.
A
dry
spell
begins
in
the
Rajasthani
splendour
of
the
deserts
where
Prem
wants
to
marry
Marigold
but
he's
betrothed
to
a
human
Christmas
tree(played
by
an
out-of-sorts
Nandana
Sen)
who
loves
the
American
guest
Barry(Ian
Bohen)
who
loved
Marigold
before
he
loved
the
Christamas
Tree
in
Jodhpur
when
she
was
in
the
US.
Before
the
two
pairs
of
moonstruck
lovers
find
their
right
partners
the
narrative
hems
and
haws
and
hiccups
to
a
point
of
no
return.
Jeez,
whoever
said
the
path
to
love
was
easy!
It's
strewn
with
thorns
as
Salman
and
his
American
co-star
perform
some
appallingly
choreographed
numbers(tuned
with
lip-parching
nonchalance
by
Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy)
before
the
wedding
shehnai
is
heard
loud
and
clear.
At
the
end
of
it
all
Marigold
isn't
such
a
bad
film.
It
has
some
sassy
lines
and
an
ultra-cool
Salman
who
swings
from
sweep-waltz
to
sleepwalk
in
the
blink
of
a
(moist)
eye.
There're
lots
of
digs
at
Bollywood(Vikas
Bhalla
plays
a
very
bad
actor
rather
well)
and
Hollywood(the
sequel
mania
which
has
gripped
our
cinema
has
its
origins
in
Bush-land).
But
Marigold
Lexton
needn't
fear
another
number
added
to
her
repertoire.