Lisa
On
Embracing
Motherhood
For
The
First
Time
"My
life
at
the
moment
is
full
of
cascading
emotions,
attempting
to
coordinate
feeding,
napping
and
play
schedules
while
juggling
work,
self
care,
travel
and
time
with
friends,
family
and
my
hubby.
My
life
has
been
full
of
crazy
adventures
but
right
now
I'm
experiencing
a
new
level
of
anarchy-
and
love."
'The
Desire
For
Children
Grew
After
I
Met
&
Married
My
Soul
Mate'
"When
I
was
younger,
becoming
a
mother
was
never
my
plan.
But
so
many
things
in
my
life
have
been
unplanned-
both
the
most
fulfilling
and
the
most
challenging-
so
when
the
desire
for
children
grew
after
I
met
and
married
my
soul
mate
Jason
Dehni,
it
frankly
caught
me
by
surprise.
Every
new
phase
of
life
challenges
my
openness
and
the
ability
to
adapt
with
each
new
experience."
It
Wasn't
An
Easy
Journey
"Our
daughters,
Sufi
and
Soleil
Ray-Dehni
were
born
via
surrogate
in
Tbilisi,
Georgia
this
June.
It's
been
an
arduous
and
interesting
experience.
Having
been
diagnosed
with
Multiple
Myeloma,
a
blood
cancer,
in
2009
which
requires
me
to
be
on
a
lifelong
dose
of
medication
pre-empted
the
possibility
for
me
to
carry
children
myself.
Fortunately
technology
has
progressed
where
there
are
choices
and
new
possibilities
for
having
children.
My
husband
and
I
decided
to
pursue
surrogacy.
India
was
the
obvious
choice.
We
consulted
a
reputed
fertility
doctor
but
a
week
before
we
could
begin,
India
outlawed
commercial
surrogacy.
We
were
crushed.
While
I
understand
the
pressing
need
to
regulate
the
industry
and
prevent
exploitation
of
surrogate
mothers,
it
was
a
case
of
-literally-
throwing
out
the
baby
with
the
bath
water.
But
I
am
nothing
if
not
determined.
My
husband
and
I
were
advised
we
could
continue
the
process
in
India,
there
were
‘ways' but
we
did
not
want
to
bring
our
children
into
the
world
under
a
cloud
of
uncertainty.
And
so
we
began
a
tough,
at
times
frustrating
journey.
We
hired
an
agency
to
help,
had
an
unsuccessful
attempt
in
Mexico,
spent
a
lot
of
money,
emotional
resources
and
sleepless
nights.
But
as
a
cancer
survivor,
I
believe
firmly
in
over
coming
the
odds.
And
with
my
husband's
support
and
a
few
close
friends
sometimes
that
means
shutting
off
people
who
say
‘you
can't'
and
focusing
on
the
faith
that
it's
possible-
not
easy-
but
possible.
Finally
we
settled
on
the
country
of
Georgia,
where
the
surrogacy
process
is
legal,
transparent,
regulated
and
overall
a
beneficial
process
for
both
sides.
We
relocated
to
Tbilisi,
Georgia,
for
the
birth
for
a
few
months.
We
choose
to
name
our
girls
Sufi-
the
mystic-
and
Soleil-
the
French
word
for
‘sun'.
I
used
to
worry
having
kids
would
slow
me
down,
or
define
me,
but
I've
put
those
old
beliefs
to
bed.
My
husband
and
I
are
becoming
parents
in
our
mid-40s
which
is
also
unconventional,
but
the
right
time
for
us.
I
will
teach
my
girls
to
be
resilient,
strong,
open,
and
that
they
can
achieve
anything
they
set
their
hearts
on.
There
are
no
boundaries
except
the
ones
in
our
minds
and
children
have
no
ideas
of
what
you
can
and
cannot
achieve.
Bringing
up
the
next
generation
to
be
kind
is
the
greatest
chance
we
have
for
a
better
future.
(I
can't
resist
whispering
in
their
tiny
ears-
‘The
Future
is
Female!')"
'I
Am
Grateful
For
My
Miracle
Daughters'
I
can't
wait
to
bring
our
daughters
to
our
home
in
Mumbai.
I
love
to
see
Jason
with
them,
growing
into
his
new
role
as
a
father,
holding
them,
changing
diapers
on
the
weekend,
with
a
burp
cloth
I
got
him
which
is
embroidered
with
‘Men
Who
Change
Diapers,
Change
the
World'.
I
wanted
to
share
our
intimate
story
because
I
believe
there
is
a
lot
of
misunderstanding
about
surrogacy
and
the
reasons
some
people
choose
to
do
it.
I
wanted
to
share
our
struggle
and
triumph.
Having
been
open
about
my
cancer
journey
and
received
so
much
unconditional
support,
sharing
this
moment
of
happiness
feels
right.
Hopefully
our
story
can
give
hope
to
others
struggling
to
have
kids.
Life
throws
you
both
challenges
and
miracles
and
I'm
unspeakably
grateful
for
my
miracle
daughters."